The Countdown to 2007!

What a year 2006 has been!!

I started off the year living common-law, working for other people growing miserable within the office I worked at, watching my little girl grow.

In June I opened my own centre (within the same company). I'll have 2 by April 2007! I work for myself which feels great when I'm working my @$$ off! I finally feel like I'm getting my life on track, business is better than anticipated!

I have goals for 2007!
*As I sit here sipping my Starbucks coffee liqueur (ha!ha!)...I want to lose a few pounds for our cruise through the Caribbean in March as well as Corporate Meeting (which is also in March)!

*I want to start my journey to become a SMBC (single mom by choice) for a second time. Not sure whether I want to do it by donation or by international adoption but it won't be until the fall.

*And my #1 goal for 2007....to buy a house for myself and my daugther! I want us to have our own home again. It's hard on Emily since we've been living with my parents again.

I've given up on my family after my horrible Christmas. In a few weeks I'm going to go and visit my birth-grandma for the first time and open a new chapter in my life. Communication with Emily's dad is still nonexistent (which is probably easier on her). From January 2006 to December 2006 I have definately come a long way in life and I finally feel like I'm going in the right direction. I'm 24...it's about time!

I'm going to ring in the new year with a glass of wine while sitting in the hottub!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!! All the best in 2007!
xo

Going Home Tomorrow!

My brother flies out tonight and boy do I wish I could go with him! But we'd have to pay to get my ticket changed to fly out tonight. I'll wait until tomorrow.

I realized last night that I really hate my family. My uncle made me cry last night by telling me that my fear of being on a boat and not on land wasn't valid. Who is he to say that my fear isn't "real"? Fuck you! My grandma also made it be known that I was a shitty parent. Well...I'm not....my daughter is wonderful and has come out quite normal & intelligent. She's just jealous because she raised four children with a husband and they still came out messed up!

I'm debating on maybe going to visit my birth grandma on New Years weekend. Maybe her family isn't as fucked up as this one. No, really, I'd be going to get some closure...not to seek out normal people.

I have to go and give the girls at work a phone call. Want to make sure everything is cool on the home front.

D.D.

Merry Christmas!

For real this time. We are here and have been for a couple days in Victoria, B.C. and I'm ready to be home. But we'll be here until December 28th.

This Christmas hasn't been the best. I've learned some dark secrets about this family and realized that alot of things have been kept from me. I've also realized that I enjoy the Christmas season but now I like the commercial side of it rather than spending time with family. I'm absolutely dreading our family cruise now and am quite bitter about spending anymore time with this family.

Sometimes I feel proud that I'm adopted...other times I'm sick and tired of being treated differently than everyone else in my family.

Christmas 2006 has taught me that you can't trust the people you love most (sad but true) and that you really have to hold your children close to you. It makes me eager to give Emily a sibling next year (or try to) so I can form my own family so I don't have to depend on this family.

This is no longer a holiday but rather an imprisonment. I can't even get away. All the vehicles that are available to us are stick shift and nobody has the time to take me to the car rental place.

The alcohol has been flowing and sometimes it's my own get away. I hate drinking but I hate being sober in this place even more. Our family is upstairs right now watching a movie while others are in the kitchen preparing our feast.

My aunt has gorgeous stairs that are made out of wood that have been in this house since it was built (a long long time ago) but they don't have anything on them and I took a tumble last night. My ass hurts soooo much. I can't sit for a great deal of time so I've been laying in bed on my side. I'll be taking a bit of Tylenol to ensure that I can make it through Christmas dinner. I was going to try and get my ticket changed so I could come home sooner but now it looks like I'll need the time to allow my bum to heal so I can make it through the flight back home.

I have to say that I really did enjoy Christmas Eve...I met someone (a guy) who was very nice and we had a lot in common. He would be my aunt's nephew (but she's my aunt through marriage because she married my dad's brother). I'm not holding my breath that anything comes of it because we live in different provinces but it was nice to have some good company.

I guess I better end this and cruise the net some more before showing my face to my family as we gather around...yet another....Christmas Dinner.

Merry Christmas! (a little early)

We celebrated our Christmas on Sunday because we fly to Victoria, B.C. tomorrow evening for 7 days! I'll be taking a couple "Santa" presents out to Victoria for my daughter because she thinks Santa won't be able to find her again. She keeps saying she's having another Christmas! ha ha.
My Dad & I really wanted to go to my aunts for Christmas on the coast but because we're going on our cruise in the spring....nobody else wanted to spend the money on plane tickets so grandma & grandpa bought us all tickets to go out there!! Woohoo!! There's 12 of us flying out there tomorrow night. In March there will be 20 of us all going on the cruise too. It's going to be soooo fun!

A client of mine told me this morning that she saw 'C' (my former flame and I swear he's my soul mate -- see Sept 28/06 post "My Past Comes Knockin") in the city and she had mentioned she saw me recently and told him where I work and that she was on the program and he said..."Tell her I say Hi". I asked her if he was single (lame, I know! lol) and she wasn't sure. But I said that he knows where to find me. ha ha. I just can't get that guy out of my head...since 1999 (the first time I laid eyes on him)!!

Now THAT just made my Christmas.

Pictures of Emily & Cally

Sweet Memories....

These pictures were taken before Cally got sick. She was plump & soooo cuddly!! Atleast we have these precious pictures to remind us of the happy times we had with her.

Cally (July 2000 - December 2006)

Cally's Illness Timeline

It was so hard today losing my best fur friend. She was a fighter right until the end. I was okay all day but now that it's bedtime...it's hard for me to fall asleep.

I'm cutting & pasting the posts I originally posted on the "Cats Health Issues" board at iVillage.

October 15/2006 - Our Sunday Emergency
I don't know where to start. It was so tragic this morning. My furbaby "Cally" is 6 years old and she found me in 2001. She was a pregnant stray. She had her babies, we found them homes and she got fixed. She's an adorable cat and was mine until my daughter was born, now Cally belongs to my daughter, Emily (she's 4). She's a tortishell marked cat and when I took her to get her fixed the ladies at the vet clinic wanted to keep her!!
All this week Cally had been acting strange. I knew she should go to the vet but then thought she was back to her old self. How wrong I was. This morning while I was cleaning out her kitty litter box my dad comes running to me saying "something is seriously wrong with Cally, come now!!" So I ran to her. She had fallen down a few stairs and she was salivating from her mouth by what seemed like tablespoons at a time. She was also leaving little rabbit poops on the stairs (which is NOT like her at all...she has never had an accident). It was like she didn't know where she was and she wouldn't respond to anything. I immediately phoned the vet crying my eyes out...she probably thought I was a big baby. LOL. She had never heard of this and figured maybe I should bring her in. She then brought in the vet tech too. The conclusion...
She was severely anemic...her gums were white and so was her tongue. They figure it might be a blood born parasite. Her red blood cell count was at 14% (anything under 30% is very critical). The good thing was that her body was reproducing red blood cells but just couldn't keep up. They gave her medicine to kill the parasite if there is one. They sent her bloodwork out on the greyhound bus to a out-of-town lab (we live in a small town). Just to make sure there's nothing wrong with her liver or kidneys. The vet's own cat was there in the clinic so they sedated him to give Cally a blood transfusion. They gave her a steroid to help her body accept the blood. She made it through the transfusion!! And I asked about the donor kitty, he's doing fine...won't eat yet because he's still groggy but he's wrapped up in a warm blanket and is doing well. Cally might not be so lucky if she needs another transfusion but I'm not going to think about that. I've been getting these updates from them every couple hours and the last one was to let me know that she pulled through the transfusion and was purring! Awww. Cally will be in the hospital for another 2 days atleast to make sure she pulls through it all and gets better again.
It wasn't hard making the decision to spend the money to do whatever to help her pull through. I put down $500 this morning and when all is said and done I'll have to put down another $500. Yikes! But she's so worth it and if I hadn't spent the money she definately would have died and I would have regretted it for the rest of my life. There's just no guarantee that she's going to pull through but it is looking promising.
My next update from the clinic will be tomorrow morning unless something drastic happens. I'm just so glad I didn't wait unitl tomorrow to get her checked. Sorry this is so long. I can't believe how they all just become part of the family. I lost 2 cats earlier this year (one to leukemia and one to cancer) and I lost my dog 2 years ago at the tender age of 18 years. I can't lose another one!
Sincerely,~Dana, Emily & Cally (the trooper!)

October 17/2006 - Cally's Update
Cally came home this afternoon. Tomorrow I go to the vet and pick up her medicine. She'll be on an antibiotic to help get rid of the parasite in her system if she has one (they have to treat it as a parasite just in case at this point because all symptoms point to parasite).They found large blue cells in her blood. The vet here thought it was baby red blood cells but turns out after sending her blood out to be tested that it may be leukemia cells. She's back to her old self though so it's hard to imagine that something like leukemia could be happening in that little body. Right now her leukemia test is negative but it could turn positive. I'm going to ask at this point if getting her leukemia booster updated would help her chances of keeping that negative blood test.
I also found out that if one cat has leukemia he/she can transfer it to another cat. But in the second cat it can appear in cancer like symptoms. That's probably why I lost two cats earlier this year but they were best of friends and were both 13 years old, it would have been cruel to keep them apart.
It was so special...Cally and I had atleast 45 minutes of good cuddle time. She was nuzzling me and licking me, it was like she was thanking me for saving her. Aww. Animals are soooo special.
Thank you all for your prayers and good luck vibes. We really appreciate that!! I'll definately stick around this board...you all are wonderful!

November 10/2006 - 3 Week Update on Cally
It's going to be a waiting game.
3 weeks ago Cally's PCV test came back with a red blood cell count of 14%. Today it was 18%. But what we don't know is if it was ever into the 20% range and now she's coming back down. Her gums are white again which means she's back to being anemic. She was getting terribly sick while taking tetracycline (sp?). She's now on prednisone to try and stimulate the bone marrow.
We really enjoyed it when she was back to her old self for those 3 weeks. Now she's distant and hates cuddling and is really lethargic. Unless Cally takes a turn for the worse she'll be going back to the vet in 2 weeks for another PCV test to see what her count is again. They did say that the red blood cells that they took from the other cat and put into Cally will only have a life span of 3 weeks...we're at the 3 week mark right now and she's going back downhill. Her poor little body isn't performing.
I'm scared she's not going to make it this time.Will keep you all updated. Thanks again for your support during this trying time.

December 2/2006 - My Last Update on Cally
Well I got over my money issue and decided that I would pay for the vet clinic to do anything for Cally that they could. They can't exactly pin point what's wrong. They think it's a tumor but they aren't sure if it's in the bone or in her blood. They can't do another transfusion because a second one would kill her (I think it has something to do with mis-matching blood). Now she's started sneezing up mucous....the next thing will she'll start sneezing blood. She's losing weight but when we pet her she still purrs. The vet said that she was surprised Cally was still with us. She's a trooper!!
There's nothing more we can do so I'm making the horrible decision to put her down on Tuesday. She's only 6...this is so unfair.

December 5/2006 - Goodbye
Goodbye sweetheart. I love you so much. Your pain is gone now. It's been 11 hours without you and it hurts so much to walk by your rocking chair and not see you laying there. I never thought it would hurt this much.
I hope you forgive me. We miss you.
xoxo

Where has the time gone??

Business has picked up and I have obviously neglected my blog!!

So much has happened...Halloween....Thanksgiving. I had to threaten a daycare provider with harassment and then fire her and take Emily to a new provider.

I lose my furbaby friend tomorrow. My Cally has been sick since the beginning of October and we have been regulars at the vet clinic since then. They think she has leukemia. Now her lungs are filling up with fluid and....she's not going to get better. I've been really stressed over this for a long time.

On a positive note, I'm done my Christmas shopping and most of my presents are wrapped now! I can stay out of the shopping malls and crazy busy stores now. Woohoo!!

I'll put a little more detail into another post....soon! I promise!